Sayings of Father John Domas

Just pretend I didn't say anything.

I may be wrong, but what if I'm right?

"Are you behaving yourself?" Yes, but I live in hope.

My psychiatrist doesn't want me to talk about that.

"How are you today?" Fantastic! But it's still early.

San Bernardino bishop Phillip Straling, about 1990: "John, you're a maverick and a loose cannon." Thank you, bishop. But I don't think I can live up to that honor.

I want to live to be a hundred -- two hours at a time.

Just because you know how to eat, it doesn't mean you can manage a restaurant.

"It's very hot today." Winter is coming.

"It's very cold today." July is coming.

Charismatic Catholics?! I call them Cruisamatics.

"Two heads are better than one." Yes, unless they're on the same shoulders.

"I'm Irish on my father's side." You can get over that.

"May I sit here?" Yes, but don't sit too close. I get excited.

I came to San Diego to finish my studies for the priesthood. Chicago wanted only the cream of the crop, and I wasn't part of the cream.

"We'll know the answer when we get to heaven." Yes, and we'll say 'Oh, that!'

"The word you're thinking of is 'ecumenical.' " Yes, thank you. (smiling pause) Isn't that what I just said?

How goes the battle?

In 1983 the church revised the Code of Canon Law. I thought the church should just get rid of Canon Law.

(Listening to a romantic song in Spanish) I don't understand the words, but I understand passion.

Puedo escuchar en todos los idiomas, pero entender -- solamente inglés. (I can listen in all languages, but understand -- only English.)

(Seeing a tall person walk by) What's he trying to prove?

(Expressing surprise) Ay, caramba!

Ahi te wacho. (Mexican-American slang for "I'll see you later.")

A basilica is a church that has been made a monsignor.

"I think I'll die before you do." Let's not make a race out of it.

"That book case could fall on your head in an earthquake." Do you know what you're reminding me? Why priests shouldn't get married!

"You're looking good, Father." Thank you. But why doesn't anyone say I'm good-looking?

Doctors don't operate any more. They proceed. They do procedures.

"We can teach you how to play Mexican Train." No, thank you. I already have a life style.

(In the hospital) They ask how tall I am, and I say 4 ft. 11 in. But they never measure me.

One billion Chinese have never heard of Jesus Christ. I'm sure God loves them as much as he loves us.

Women and children have tummies. Men have stomachs.

Women and children are cute. Men are handsome and bold.